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How to Really Be a Sexy Dancer

Let’s talk about “sexiness” and dancing.⁠

Melissa is dancing, smiling and looking over her left shoulder, with a natural background filled with sunlight and trees.
Photo credit: @CopiousMedia

Yes, many Latin dances are very “sexy”. But I think a lot of people go down a path that becomes more about PERFORMING it - doing certain hot moves they learned in class, approaching their partner with a certain brand of sexuality that we see in movies and TV - rather than BEING it.⁠

Because BEING sexy is not actually about fitting into the narrow categories of beauty and male/female gender dynamics that we’re taught to emulate. It’s actually about expressing YOURSELF with confidence. THAT'S hot.⁠

For me, that means I smile a lot when I dance, I buzz with energy, I dive into the sensuality of my movements, I connect with my partner energetically, I play and flirt. I don’t do sexy face - I don’t even really know how. I don’t act “hot girl” cool and detached - I’m not very good at that either. I just act like … Melissa.⁠

⁠When you combine the embodiment of dance technique with your vulnerability in expressing your love and joy - THAT is sexy.

Remember that the next time you feel intimidated by who is sexy or not on the dance floor.

Or the next time you feel put off by a partner who is coming on strong and you think there’s something wrong with you because you don’t know how to respond.

Your greatest strength, beauty, and sexiness as a dancer comes from BEING YOURSELF.




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